Creating "Art" Amongst Utter Visual & Audio Disparity

I am sitting in front of my computer, putting together a set of flyers with a matching order card and an envelope for a free video set we're getting ready to send in the mail to our customers. It's for a "MILF mailing", one whose content targets customers who like to see videos with older women in them. This, in and of itself, doesn't seem all too out of the ordinary, seeing as how this is my job.

I am, however, working remotely this week as I finish up spending some time with my father in Nevada after my Mother's funeral last week. Being remote allows me a greater deal of flexibility as to where I can sit and create, or what I can wear while doing my work (though in truth, I've not really explored that angle too much. I'm sitting here in shorts and a shirt, which is pretty much the same dress code I keep at work. And besides, it seems to me that designing explicit flyers au naturale at the dinner table in my parents house would be so, SO gauche!)

So, to not get too off-topic, and to keep this to a shorter than usual blog entry, I am sitting here at the kitchen table designing these flyers while, to my right in the living room, the large screen HDTV is playing "The Sound Of Music" (one of the many DVDs I brought with me to pass the time.) I must say that the total juxtaposition of the hardcore sexually explicit nature of the material on the screen in front of me compared to the saccharine sweet "raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens" nature of the material on the giant screen to my right is so incongrously great that I honestly expect God to just come on down and smite the house at any second, or to look up and see a hole tear open in the fabric of reality.

The level of "gay" in the house was so high a few minutes ago, it actually woke my father out of a deep sleep. I'm kinda glad he's got the cheapo fire alarms, since a high-priced, more sensitive model may have accidentally gone off as the level of "flaming" skyrocketed as the movie progressed. My Dad, half-awake, proceeded to shamble out of his bedroom and down the hall to the living room where he looked around in bewilderment.(Or, as I privately thought, he seemed to be looking around to see where I had hid the other 30 or so gay guys that surely would have been needed to have brought the level of "gay" in the house up to such a homo-crecendo that it could have actually woken him up despite the half a Xanax he'd taken to get to sleep.) Giving up his cursory search for the gaggle of other non-existent gay men in the house, he then asked me to please keep it to a dull roar. I told him that I was sorry, and that I didn't think I was singing along quite so loudly....at which point he snorted, rolled his eyes, and mumbled something snippy and sarcastic about really having 4 girls in the family instead of 3 girls and a boy and then shuffled back to his bedroom and closed the door.

Oh well, back to the salt mines. This stuff doesn't create itself you know, and I still have a flyer or two, as well as an order card and an envelope to design. Luckily for me, I brought along "My Fair Lady" to watch once "The Sound Of Music" has played its last note! Tonight, I feel that I am well-fit by the immortal words of Professor Henry Higgins:

I'm an ordinary man, Who desires nothing more than an ordinary chance,
to live exactly as he likes, and do precisely what he wants...

An average man am I, of no eccentric whim,
Who likes to live his life, free of strife,
doing whatever he thinks is best, for him,
Well... just an ordinary man (that designs explicit adult materials for a living!)

Hmm... I think I can feel the level of "gay" in the house creeping back up into the dangerous "pink zone." I can only hope my Dad had the sense to put in his earplugs and take the other half of that Xanax.