As Thanksgiving quickly approaches and John and I make plans to head to the DC area to celebrate Thanksgiving with pretty much all of my extended family, a friend of mine said something to me that gave me pause. He said, "It's kind of hard to give thanks for a year as totally screwed as this one's been, eh?"
At first, I had to agree with him. Yeah. This has been not one of the better years I've lived through, if you look at from the point of view of the problems that have, well... caused it to be totally screwed. Initially, that was the way I looked at it. Then, just last week as I drove home from work, I was thumbing absently at my iPod as it played through my newly added playlist of Christmas songs, when a song from Josh Groban's Christmas album from 2007/08 started. It's a song called "Thankful" and it made me think of my friend's statement and look at my year in a new perspective.
Yeah, I could look at over the last year and spend a lot of time and energy listing off all the really crappy things that have happened, or, I could look at it like this:
At first, I had to agree with him. Yeah. This has been not one of the better years I've lived through, if you look at from the point of view of the problems that have, well... caused it to be totally screwed. Initially, that was the way I looked at it. Then, just last week as I drove home from work, I was thumbing absently at my iPod as it played through my newly added playlist of Christmas songs, when a song from Josh Groban's Christmas album from 2007/08 started. It's a song called "Thankful" and it made me think of my friend's statement and look at my year in a new perspective.
Yeah, I could look at over the last year and spend a lot of time and energy listing off all the really crappy things that have happened, or, I could look at it like this:
In 2008, my mom was lucky enough to cough up blood in May, which got her to go to the doctor and find out that she had lung, rib, neck and brain cancer. She then traveled across the country to the DC area to begin effective treatment that is slowly beating back the cancer in her body. If she hadn't coughed up the blood, she wouldn't have known what was growing inside her at all and might not be here now to celebrate this thanksgiving with myself and my family.
In 2008, my dad was having some edema and breathing issues while staying in Alexandria with my mom for her chemo treatments. My sister was luckily on hand and so she hooked him up with a cardiologist friend of hers who identified his issues as being rather serious congestive heart issues, and now he has a pacemaker/defibrillator helping to regulate his heart. Again, if he had been stubborn and not told anyone, he might not be alive now to celebrate this holiday.
In 2008, my partner John was lucky enough to get moved laterally away from the internet team over to the Prospecting team at work, downgrading his stress level by getting moved away from a manager that was an utterly useless waste of DNA and who was out for blood, to one more like most other micro-managers out there -- one who simply tries his patience on a daily basis. If he hadn't moved, his former manager had already made plans to fire him, simply because he had cancer and she wanted a woman to have his job. On the upside, she up and quit a few months ago just as whispers of her impending termination began to circulate. It's hard to say that she'll be missed, especially with so many employees hoping that they'll still run into her "outside of the building." Usually the employees that say they hope to "run into her" are the ones revving the engines on their cars/SUVs. I guess I should give thanks that she left the company, though it did dash my hopes for a holy smiting. (But if God is reading my blog, just feel free to smite her anyways, cuz you know what I say, why waste a good smiting, right? It's not like her leaving of her own volition left her any less deserving of a holy smackdown, so go right ahead and smite away! Give me yet another reason to give thanks!)
In 2008, over 30% of our retirement money evaporated, our monthly house payments went from $1300 to $1800 so that we could get away from a soon to re-adjust ARM mortgage. However, in losing that money, as well as the country losing nearly half a trillion dollars in the Wall Street meltdown, everybody finally woke up enough to realize that you don't elect a president primarily because you think he's a good christian or that he's someone you'd want to hang out with and have a beer. You elect the guy who is going to do the best job looking out for the welfare of everyone in the country, not just to throw buttloads of money to his rich crony friends. The country realized that the current administration's policies only benefit GWMs (Guys With Money), so they elected a Democratic President that will begin to pull the country back from the financial suckhole into which the Republicans have driven it and back to the prosperity that the Democrats left it in back in 2000.
In 2008, I got to go see a Durham Bulls ballgame with my next door neighbor Jean Spencer, complete with 4th of July fireworks (which had been rain delayed from the actual 4th of July game night), and we had an absolute blast! We drove over to the stadium in the Volvo convertible and she said being out with the top down and all, that she felt like a young girl again. It is that memory that I hold onto now when I think of Jean; not the one of going to her funeral a little less than a month later after she died suddenly of a heart attack.
In 2008, my friend Daniel was lucky enough to break off his relationship and break away from his ex and move in with a nice guy named Don and they've been fused at the hip ever since.
In 2008, my friend Susan lost her child support and full custody of her kids, and had to move to a different part of Chapel Hill to a smaller apartment that was affordable for her. In doing so, however, she was able to continue to stand and prosper on her own without child support while at the same time showing her husband that taking care of two kids isn't nearly the picnic he had apparently envisioned it to be. I am glad that, though she is no longer living two doors down, we have been able to maintain and grow our friendship, as well as still be a part of her boys' lives.
In 2008, my friend Josh seemingly spent more time in the hospital than he did out of it. However, he was able to get batteries of tests done to help him understand his health issues better, and is hopefully (knock on wood... lots and lots of wood.... knock hard!) on the way back to good health.
In 2008, I got my blood pressure under control and lost 25 lbs.
In 2008, my friend Paul and his partner from Nevada went and tied the knot in a beautiful California wedding. What should be left unsaid is that the people of California took it upon themselves to make Paul and his partner and John and myself and all other gay and lesbian people second class citizens by voting in Proposition 8, a despicable anti-gay amendment to California's constitution. John and I emailed Paul the other day to tell him that we were thinking of him and his partner and that, whatever California decides, their marriage is more real and more of a reality than any ink on a marriage license could ever make it.
I guess another way of looking at it would be to be give thanks that I had another year to be with the people I really love and care about. I had another year with John, another year with my folks and family, another year to share good times with my friends, and even had another year of loving companionship with my wonderful old dogs, two of whom are getting so advanced in years that they may not have many more holidays left.
Yeah... I think those are reasons enough to give thanks, don't you?
Yeah... I think those are reasons enough to give thanks, don't you?
